And when you stop, give yourself the privilege and take the wisdom to breathe in the moment, because even at half-way up, the view is pretty fucking cool and heck of a lot better than all the way down. So give yourself a yoga-hug, do a little sun-salutation, and hear and feel your breath– you’re out of breath and you’re going to get it back. In the mean time, did you see squirrel?
I think it’s a pretty brave effing creature, balancing on the tip of the branch with birds of prey hovering above. But the thing about the squirrel is that they know their bodies, know the branch, are one with the fucking branch. Ain’t nothing short of an earthquake that’ll make ’em fall.
That’s you. That’s me.
I am Squirrel.
I am goddamn grateful for being on the receiving end of so much love– and not just from frozen yogurt, but yeah, also from frozen yogurt.
We all impact the grounds we walk on, and the grounds we walk on have a very problematic history that cannot be ignored. For too long, White humans/White culture have worked toward self-resilience, self-growth, driven by material desires and progress. The individualist, capitalist society that colonized the land I live on spread toxicity. Poisoned, both figuratively and literally, the community.
I acknowledge that the ground I work and live on is located on the traditional territories of the Songhees First Nations and as a White settler I have privilege. I am responsible for the damage my ancestors caused; I need to unlearn all the bad shit. I have a responsibility to this ground, where I came from, how I got here, and where I’m going. To stop unconsciously benefiting from my privilege. TO acknowledge collective resilience.
I Choose to take care of myself, I choose to heal, I choose to learn, and I choose to teach/share.
I have a responsibility to me, right now, but also to everyone around me.
So every morning, before I ask what everyone else needs, I ask, What do you need today?
I am practicing answering that question without guilt, without neglecting my community.
I see love. I see hope–
I turn the rotten into fermented goodness.
I dance in my living room and love the way my body feels rhythm, unafraid to extend every limb outward, unbound.
In spite of a hectic Monday
morning, with two little children that would rather spend all morning playing Lego then even dream of helping their mother get ready and out the door. Out quick and easy cereal breakfast being off the table, as I forgot to make cashew milk last night (shit!) so a cooked breakfast was need….. Amongst all this I still made time for one of my favorite self love rituals. Got lemon water, in a fancy cup, on an empty tummy…. Makes me feel warm and loved all over. starts my day on the right path and gets everything moving along smoothly… In and out!!
Cheers to self loving warmth in a mug.
Cheers lady– you’re a rock star ma! ❤
I leave bits and pieces of my material life behind me wherever I go: keys, my wallet, my scarves and jackets. Some things return to me, others I never see again. Life. Sometimes I place things in my closets, or drawers, or cupboards haphazardly because I don’t know what else do with the thing I hold in my hand. There will always be at least one cupboard that isn’t organized. A cupboard that holds an object it probably shouldn’t– an object I can’t find any other place for, and then I forget.
So opening cupboards can feel scary.
But you gotta do it–
And then you must let go of that which no longer serves you.
Like my blow dryer.
Like artificial deadlines.
I love my pace, my process. It’s mine and I will work with it, not against it. I will not berate myself for the things I do not know. I love what I will learn from the act of doing, not necessarily that final product.
But I’m not going to lie– It’ll feel fucking cool when I finish my degree.
“The knight looked surprised by the question. ‘What does it matter where my body happens to be?’ he said. ‘My mind goes on working all the same. In fact, the more head downwards I am, the more I keep inventing new things.” (Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking Glass)
Calm your mind, calm your body, live with love. Inventions are neat, but some days you need to face the real.
I face the effing real.
What does your fear, your stuck, your apprehension need?
It needs a giant hug, so I wrap my long and clumsy arms around all the things and I say, not now, sweet fear, thank-you for showing your self to me, but now I get to dream of other things, with the sounds of nighttime traffic moving in the distance, wind brushing against my curtains, my heart beat slowly bringing my body down.
Down to the ground where I root myself–