I have been working on going with the flow and practicing presence. And the days have been abnormally busy for us, so it was a perfect time to let go and flow! Just allowing ones self to experience what’s unfolding in real life, rather than trying to mold and shape it into what you had planned, is soooooo much less exhausting. And satisfying. Trying to control everything is only going to lead to disappointment and stress at some point in time. Letting go of what’s not serving you is a huge act of self care, love and appreciation.

– S

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Day 5, So she said she could stay

When I stand with my legs spread, my big toes inverted, and my arms on my hips I am power; I am strong; I am the little thing that got too big for her heart and exploded with love.

I acknowledged the buzz running through my body the brain chatter and I said , BE STILL! In a very angry and authoritative voice and the chatter said, Babe, you gotta work for our respect.

So I teased, stretched and massaged every muscle until I felt calm and safe.

I have not always felt safe.

Plenty

Goodnight Day 4. Thank-you for existing.

Love is an infinite power.

(the tea bag once said this to me, and I was like, cool,  but what does the even mean? And the tea just sat there steeping. I’m still trying to figure it out. This other tea bag once said, You are unlimited, and I was  obviously like, DAMN STRAIGHT I AM. And because this tea bag made so much sense I asked it what the other tea bag meant, and it mumbled something about something and I think I made it feel embarrassed. But the feelings of the tea bag aren’t my feelings, and I’m unlimited. So I just went to bed).

If you need to stop halfway up, let yourself stop (Mornin’ D. 4)

And when you stop, give yourself the privilege and take the wisdom to breathe in the moment, because even at half-way up, the view is pretty fucking cool and heck of a lot better than all the way down. So give yourself a yoga-hug, do a little sun-salutation, and hear and feel your breath– you’re out of breath and you’re going to get it back. In the mean time, did you see squirrel?

I think it’s a pretty brave effing creature, balancing on the tip of the branch with birds of prey hovering above. But the thing about the squirrel is that they know their bodies, know the branch, are one with the fucking branch. Ain’t nothing short of an earthquake that’ll make ’em fall.

That’s you. That’s me.

Be squirrel.

I am Squirrel.

Day 3: The Individualist-raised, unlearned

We all impact the grounds we walk on, and the grounds we walk on have a very problematic history that cannot be ignored. For too long, White humans/White culture have worked toward self-resilience, self-growth, driven by material desires and progress. The individualist, capitalist society that colonized the land I live on spread toxicity. Poisoned, both figuratively and literally, the community.

I acknowledge that the ground I work and live on is located on the traditional territories of the Songhees First Nations and as a White settler I have privilege.  I am responsible for the damage my ancestors caused; I need to unlearn all the bad shit. I have a responsibility to this ground, where I came from,  how I got here, and where I’m going. To stop unconsciously benefiting from my privilege. TO acknowledge collective resilience.

I Choose to take care of myself, I choose to heal, I choose to learn, and I choose to teach/share.

I have a responsibility to me, right now, but also to everyone around me.

So every morning, before I ask what everyone else needs, I ask, What do you need today?

I am practicing answering that question without guilt, without neglecting my community.