Snez’ Day 2: I take care of me

From S:
In spite of a hectic Monday morning, with two little children that would rather spend all morning playing Lego then even dream of helping their mother get ready and out the door. Out quick and easy cereal breakfast being off the table, as I forgot to make cashew milk last night (shit!) so a cooked breakfast was need….. Amongst all this I still made time for one of my favorite self love rituals. Got lemon water, in a fancy cup, on an empty tummy…. Makes me feel warm and loved all over. starts my day on the right path and gets everything moving along smoothly… In and out!!
Cheers to self loving warmth in a mug.

 Cheers lady– you’re a rock star ma! ❤

Day 2: I let go; I face the real

I leave bits and pieces of my material life behind me wherever I go: keys, my wallet, my scarves and jackets.  Some things return to me, others I never see again. Life. Sometimes I place things in my closets, or drawers, or cupboards haphazardly because I don’t know what else do with the thing I hold in my hand. There will always be at least one cupboard that isn’t organized. A cupboard that holds an object it probably shouldn’t– an object I can’t find any other place for, and then I forget.

So opening cupboards can feel scary.

But you gotta do it–

And then you must let go of that which no longer serves you.

Like my blow dryer.

Like artificial deadlines.

I love my pace, my process. It’s mine and I will work with it, not against it. I will not berate myself for the things I do not know. I love what I will learn from the act of doing, not necessarily that final product.

But I’m not going to lie– It’ll feel fucking cool when I finish my degree.

“The knight looked surprised by the question. ‘What does it matter where my body happens to be?’ he said. ‘My mind goes on working all the same. In fact, the more head downwards I am, the more I keep inventing new things.” (Lewis Carroll, Through the Looking Glass)

Calm your mind, calm your body, live with love.  Inventions are neat, but some days you need to face the real.

I face the effing real.

Goodnight Day 1: Cadence

What does your fear, your stuck, your apprehension need?

It needs a giant hug, so I wrap my long and clumsy arms around all the things and I say, not now, sweet fear, thank-you for showing your self to me, but now I get to dream of other things, with the sounds of nighttime traffic moving in the distance, wind brushing against my curtains, my heart beat slowly bringing my body down.

Down to the ground where I root myself–

I love.

-J

Good morning Day 1- did you know I’m a godforsaken fucking warrior?

What is self-love? What is love?

bell hooks says that love saves us only if we want to be saved; she says that too often women seem to think that it is a sign of their commitment and endurance to withstand and keep trying even when facing cruelty, neglect, and violence.

There’s a sleuth of us who don’t know how to identify love, receive love, or give love. Love is non-material, and not an achievement that can be measured, weighed.

But it’s one thing worth living for; the only sense that liberates me from toxicity. And love is of me, in me.

Girl, you got’s to slay those demons– walk right up to them with your brilliance, use those words you know so well and scream ENOUGH. And if they still don’t listen, bring on the magic– Dance those demons down!

Fourteen Days of Self-Love

Tomorrow I will begin two weeks of daily practices of self love.  I’m going to stay away from alcohol and other self-destructive behaviours– no matter what.  There’s no wiggle room, no one drink is fine. I’m gonna rock the shit outta self-help.

I’m going to live FUCKING FIERCE because I AM GRAND.

And even if I suck sometimes and do terrible things, it doesn’t mean I deserve to treat my body and soul like a waste containment facility.

Although right now I might feel this is VERY true, as I’m hungover and unslept and ungroomed and just generally feeling and looking terrible, I know deep in my soul that I am a fucking beautiful garden and can probably grow really neat things inside of me if I tend to me, get the weeds outs, sow some seeds and just like, try.

So here’s to fourteen days (and really long sentences)–

With much love and spirit and humility for… the imperfect; the in-progress.